The Glamour of Grammar?

What does Glamour have to do with Grammar?

Interestingly, the Oxford English Dictionary (OED) says that glamour, a word customarily associated with beauty or charm or a high level of attractiveness, comes from the same root as grammar; a word we customarily associate with ugliness or repugnance or a high level of repulsiveness.

These two words are like two very different looking sisters. While the one is alluring and pleasant, and we want to gaze upon her; the other is dull and unpleasant, and we don’t want to gaze upon her. As with the two sisters, you wonder how two words that arouse such naturally different emotions as glamour and grammar could stem from the same mother.

So it stands to reason that how these two words are connected is a matter of unending discussion and disagreement among linguist. Here is how the OED, which most agree is the supreme arbiter of the English language, explains how this came about:

Before you read this next paragraph, know that your life will not suffer much should you choose to live in ignorance of its content. A more glamorous version will follow this scholarly, grammatical entry.

“In classical Greek (also see) and Latin the word denoted the methodical study of literature (= ‘philology’ in the widest modern sense, including textual and æsthetic criticism, investigation of literary history and antiquities, explanation of allusions, etc., besides the study of the Greek and Latin languages. Post-classically, grammatica came to be restricted to the linguistic portion of this discipline, and eventually to ‘grammar’ in the mod[ern] sense. In the Middle Ages, grammatica and its Rom[an] forms chiefly meant the knowledge or study of Latin, and were hence often used as synonymous with learning in general, the knowledge peculiar to the learned class. As this was popularly supposed to include magic and astrology, the OF. gramaire was sometimes used as a name for these occult sciences. In these applications it still survives in certain corrupt forms, F. grimoire, Eng. GLAMOUR.”

It is probably enough to know that the word glamour came into English by way of Scotland, where it originally meant, the OED says, “Magic, enchantment, spell; esp. in the phrase to cast the glamour over one.” It made its way to beauty by way of magic, since the allure secured by magic was illusory and dangerous.

Now, as Fortune’s wheel creaks along, we appear to be circling back to a Medieval culture in which knowledge of grammar is peculiar to a learned (though neither wealthy nor prestigious) class, and in which mastery of grammar might as well be magic to those unlearned in it.

Careful of that word wizard, my dear, lest he seduce you

One of the surprising and delightful connection in the history of the English language is the relationship between glamour and grammar. The second, says the Oxford English Dictionary (OED), is an altered version of the first. They cite an ancient association between learning and enchantment as proof. In other words, back in the day when only priests and a few educated gentry could read and write it was thought that if you were smart enough to know grammar, the basic elements of language, you might be clever enough to convert that power to allure, amaze, even seduce. Can you imagine the fear the peasantry could have of a grammar?

Grammar has taken a bit of a nosedive since then. Today grammar connotes everything that is unglamorous: absent-minded professors; fussy schoolmarms; grammazons, nagging perfectionists; pedantic correctionists; high school students asleep at their desks with stalactites of drool hanging from their lips. Long lost from grammar are the associations with power, magic and enchantment.

Bone up on your English so you, too, can be a glamorous, successful word-wizard-cum-grammarian

Is that statement entirely valid? Think successful politicians, lawyers, salesmen, or even holier-than-thou evangelists; you get the picture. So in truth, word wizards still have the power of seduction, which means the glamour of grammar is real.

This is another reason for this series. A little grammar, you’ll learn, can go a long way, and may well lead one to a lot of grammar. Good grammar, well used,  can be a very sexy attribute. Is there a single one of you who would not like to be seen as sexy? Before you give a negative response to that question, remember that some synonyms for sex are charismatic and magnetic, as in charismatic or magnetic personality.

Alrightie, tell me this. How come we ain’t teachin’ good English no more? [sic]

Many old timers, dreaming of a Golden Age of learning that never existed. They wonder, why we don’t teach grammar any more. Well, we do, in school after school, classroom after classroom. A better question might be, if we teach grammar, why don’t people learn grammar? The answer is simple; we do teach grammar, syntax, punctuation, and spelling. But all these elements of language are out of context, outside of making meaning as a reader, a writer or a speaker. By doing so, we make grammar highly forgettable.

Stop Confusion; Speak Clear English will offer another way. Every little lesson in this series will point you toward a practical application. I’ll carry that one step farther: There is no need to learn grammar if you’re not going to use it. Good spelling is useless except to represent proper words and avoid distraction of the reader. Punctuation has no value except to point the reader toward the pace, emphasis and meaning of the words. Subjects and verbs are dusty academic terms unless you can join them together with a purpose. Punctuation is the glue that binds together the structure of vocabulary and grammar that we call sentence or a paragraph or a book.

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Introduction to the English Language series

This is the third and concluding part of this three part introduction for Stop Confusion; Speak Clear English

We will begin at where else but at the beginning

We will begin our quest for a greater command of the English language with the basics of English grammar, punctuation, usage, etc. From there, we will proceed to delve deeper and deeper into our subject. Uh, don’t worry, deeper and deeper, in this case, does not necessarily mean harder and harder.

There will be concepts offered from time to time in this series that will cause you some consternation. You will get through those little trials though and before you know it, you will be a learned speaker of the English language.

Believe me, if I did it, so can you. All you have to do is apply yourself.

Now to the real beginning, the acknowledgements.

Acknowledgements:

Some free online resource for grammar, style, and usage are Daily Writing Tips and The Purdue Online Writing Lab (OWL). The last named is a very robust website, the former is less so.

The best free online resources for anything having to do with English vocabulary are: Ask Oxford, which is the online version of the Compact Oxford English Dictionary (COED) and much more. The next is the American Heritage Dictionary (AHD); and the next best is; Merriam-Webster Dictionary (MWD). It remains, however, my go-to resource online because it offers the best interface and it offers audible pronunciation of the words defined. When a little more in-depth knowledge of a word is wanted,Thesaurus.com (a COED based resource) is a good thesaurus and dictionary, and more is good for that. So is The Free Dictionary. And, finally the Online Etymology Dictionary (Online ED), is good for those who already speak English fairly well want more in-depth knowledge of a word. There is no better online tool for the heritage of English words.

All of these online resources can easily be found. Simply Google them; that is, search for them through Google. Google is clearly the king of online search.

Some of the most important sources I used for grammar, style, and usage are not available online. The first two of these are both inexpensive. They are the rightly acclaimed The Elements of Style (TES), the original and the third edition and Warriner’s English Composition and Grammar (WECG). This last one is available only as a used book. Used books can be inexpensive, especially when purchased online. The Chicago Manual of Style (CMS) is in a class by itself as the arbiter of American style compositions.

No English dictionary is equal to The Oxford English Dictionary (OED). It is the arbiter of English words definition. Its 20 volume dictionary of the English language is astounding. Bartlett‘s Roget’s Thesaurus (BRT) is the best thesaurus I have found.

And now I wish to acknowledge the best and most important of them all

I wish to take my hat off and bow in praise of a very special group of people: all the elementary, junior high, and high school English teachers who taught me and survived to tell about it. I am sure those teachers won themselves a far greater reward in heaven for having putting up with the insults and the dirty tricks pulled on them by us meanies. We were sometimes unbelievably dumb and we seemingly always had an uncanny meanness about us. How those teachers survived and continued to love us is one of the great mysteries of my life.

Here’s a little anecdote about one of those dirty tricks

I remember one elderly teacher in high school who drove a Model T Ford to school It was a nice, neat black one; a coupe sedan: I never saw a Model T in any color other than black and all those were coupe sedans, as far as I recall. And, yes, that English teacher’s car was even then an old car.

One day some of my fellow students picked up her Model T and sat it back down so that it sat crosswise in the narrow driveway that fed into the school parking area.

Bless her heart; that dear ole soul may have been a little late getting home that night. That driveway was a tight squeeze when you drove on it in the usual manner. I was unhappy then that I missed out on that dirty trick on what we all agreed was a mean, but excellent old teacher. In hindsight, I’m glad I missed out on that particular dirty trick.  That dear old soul wasn’t really mean at all; she was simply a demanding teacher. Demanding because she knew that she had to be demanding if she was to have any hope of getting excellence out of any of us rowdies.

All I can say about those ole time school teachers is I pray to God they got a special reward for enduring us meanies. Their sickeningly paltry pay checks were certainly not much of a reward, so I would say, they had something coming for all the silent suffering they had to endure from us and from those in the educational power structure they work under.

Can you believe it?

Soon after my return home from military service one of my former teachers, Mr. Leigh, who was by then a grammar school principal, offered me a job as a teacher. I turned that offer down on the spot, even though I had no prospects of another job of consequence. To reason immediately came to mind. The job didn’t pay enough and, considering my lack of education, I would have felt like I was stealing had I taken the job.

And now, welcome to the Stop Confusion; Speak Clear English series. Now, dive in and learn English. I did it before you and you can do it now. Believe me; it will be worth the effort.

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Introduction to the English Language series

Part one of a three parts of Stop Confusion; Speak Clear English.

This series is about improving the reader’s knowledge and understanding of the various aspects of this superlative wonder we call the English Language. Good English language skills are basic to an English speaker’s ability to formulate clear thought images in their mind and turn them into clearly laid out concise thought constructs in verbal or written form.

Fortunately, English is not as difficult to learn as that last sentence is to understand.

Did that last sentence sound a little deep to you? Did you find it difficult to understand or perhaps even incomprehensible? Maybe you had to read it twice in order to understand it. If your answer to any of these questions is yes; take heart.

It may be that you were so unsure of the validity of all or a part of the sentence that your mind decided not to believe it or to at least suspend judgment. All of that going on in your mind could have made the sentence sound like a first cousin to gibberish; like the writing in the cuneiform script image depicted here would appear to be to most people, and that could have caused you to find it difficult to understand. In any event, it is a difficult sentence.

English is truly not as difficult to learn as that last sentence is to understand. All of us should review the basics of clear English once in a while.

I was thinking of Vince Lombardi as I wrote that last sentence. Maybe you, too, recall the story of how one day, when, as the then new head football coach at Green Bay, Wisconsin, he became so frustrated with what was going on with his players on the playing field that he blew the whistle and said, “Everybody stop and gather around.”

Then, kneeling down, he picked up the pigskin, and said, “Let’s start at the beginning. This is a football. These are the yard markers. I’m the coach. You are the players.” He went on, in the most elementary way, explaining the basics of football.

Like Vince’s players, let’s gather around so we can review how to speak clear English and stop confusion.

I don’t claim to be an accomplished linguist or grammarian

I make linguistic and grammatical mistakes sometimes when I speak and when I write. Even the most learned among us make the occasional error. Ordinarily, however, I speak and write clearer English than most people. Knowing my English is not perfect does not keep me from trying to better my own English language skills, or offering those of you who may need it, the fruit of my research into the writings of those who have a superior knowledge of the rules, acceptable usages, styles, vocabulary, spelling, et cetera.

The English Language files will include posts devoted to: English grammar, usage, vocabulary, etymology, spelling, and literature. An abundance of hyperlinks will be offered here-some might say offered ad nauseam—for words in the English Language files that I think that some readers, may have only a hazy understand of-here—I have in mind ESL readers.

I have already admitted that I make grammar and usage mistakes all too often when speaking and when writing. However, I do not see myself totally lacking in linguistic abilities. In fact, I have no doubt that my English is far better than that of the average college graduate; even those with a PhD of some sort. It was not ever thus, however. To paraphrase a wag, whose identity has been lost in the mists of time, I have come a long way, baby. There was a time when I did not know a verb from a predicate, or an adjective from an adverb, and I wasn’t all that sure of what a semicolon was or how to use it either. You see, I was a high school dropout.

If you have stayed with me and read this far, then you, too, are  interested in how to Stop Confusion; Speak Clear English and, thus, have a better life. Part II is just a click away.

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